When Adam was diagnosed with bladder cancer in 2023, his journey became about more than medical treatment alone. Living with clinical anxiety shaped every step of his experience. Adam sadly died in August 2025. Written by his wife, Sarah, his story is shared to raise awareness of the emotional realities of facing cancer alongside severe anxiety.
Adam first noticed blood in his urine in 2021 and, like many people, believed it was a simple infection. I was more concerned because two members of his family had had cancer. At the time, he was caring full-time for his mum, and his own health was not his priority. He was given antibiotics but the blood did not fully resolve. Adam’s GP therefore referred him to a urologist for further investigations.
Adam lived with severe anxiety and had a deep fear of hospitals and needles. This fear made attending appointments extremely difficult for him, even when he understood how important they were. There were many occasions when anxiety took over at the last moment and unfortunately this led to him missing many appointments. As his partner, I could see how distressed he was, and it caused anxiety for both of us. What helped most was speaking with his doctor about how severe his anxieties were and being referral to a psychologist at Derby Hospital. He attended every week and the sessions, together with medication, helped him to attend appointments.
Together, we attended his next appointment for a flexible cystoscopy and the consultant told us that he had bladder cancer. Adam was very anxious but managed to attend hospital for a TURBT and had a stent fitted. It was very hard to hear the diagnosis of transitional cell carcinoma of the bladder, G3 pT2. Adam was given an appointment at Derby Hospital to discuss having his bladder removed.
Despite support for his anxiety, I knew that he would not be able to go ahead with surgery but he agreed to the appointment. His psychologist attended with us. I was hopeful when he signed the consent and had his pre op checkup, met with a stoma nurse but two days before his scheduled surgery, he asked me to cancel the appointment.
After several conversations with his doctor and psychologist, we met with his consultant again and it was decided that he would have chemotherapy and radiotherapy. His treatment started in December 2023 and with the support of his psychologist, Adam travelled to Derby Hospital every day for three weeks. I was so proud of him. After 21 rounds of treatment, Adam was tired but in good spirits.
In July 2024, the consultant told us that there was a reduction in his bladder tumour. He had a follow-up appointment in September 24 with a flexible cystoscopy following an MDT meeting. The consultant recommended a TURBT and another stent to be fitted. The idea of the stent and having to be admitted to hospital, caused severe anxiety and Adam refused the treatment.
Adam had a CT scan in March 25 and his consultant tried to encourage to consider surgery again. Adam’s anxiety was very bad at this time. He had an appointment with his consultant on the 13th June and we received the devastating news that his cancer had metastasised and nothing more could be done. It was heartbreaking. He was offered chemotherapy to try and prolong his life a little longer but he refused.
We had little time to try and process this information before Adam became very unwell with sepsis. Adam discharged himself from hospital after four days. We tried to manage at home with his doctor, who was amazing. He went to a hospice for one night but with the support of his GP, district nurses, and palliative care team, Adam was able to stay at home, which meant everything to him.
Adam died at home, in his own bed, surrounded by love and care on the 15th August 2025.
Adam wanted people to know his cancer journey. He wanted to help others who may be facing bladder cancer with anxiety or fear. His message is simple: you are not weak for feeling afraid. Many people struggle with hospitals, procedures, and uncertainty, and support is available. Please speak openly to your GP or care team about your fears — whether that is anxiety, panic, or past experiences. Help can make appointments more manageable and treatment less overwhelming.
Adam had a tattoo ‘Never let your Fears Decide your Fate’.
Action Bladder Cancer UK would like to sincerely thank Sarah for sharing Adam’s story.
If you are experiencing anxiety and would like information about support services in your area, please contact us at info@actionbladdercanceruk.org
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